Footsie Rises as Boris Backs Off


British stocks are up for once after falling 5% due to speculations of a second lockdown, with FTSE 100 now up by about 5%. That suggest the market is relieved, with the measures announced by the British Prime Minister Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson being more the ‘stay safe’ sort than house arrest for all. Science apparently has determined that rarona chills out before 9:59PM, but after 10:01PM apapapappapa. So pubs have to close now after 10PM. Usually they close at 12PM, so it’s not a huge difference, but the idea presumably is to stop Brits from getting drunk as then they won’t care about rarona. Good luck with that, but the army is to patrol the pubs now because Borisov thinks the British people are some sort of insurgency fighting against the dictatorship. Masks are now compulsory for shop keepers. Them Tesco boys that don’t give a f now…

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